The desire for social validation can often present as the Fear of missing out, commonly known as FOMO. FOMO is the anxiety stemming from the perception that others may be experiencing fulfilling events from which one is excluded. This sensation can culminate in feelings of exclusion or the distress of missing significant social gatherings, opportunities, or life-altering moments.
In the film ‘The Social Network’ (2010), the director, David Fincher explores the beginnings of Facebook, which was motivated by the desire to connect individuals and offer a space to observe friends’ activities. This story of the creation of Facebook and subsequent legal disputes, taps into the core of FOMO, as users often compare their own lives to the polished lives presented online.
It is also the journey of Mark Zuckerberg’s rise from a Harvard student to the CEO of one of the world’s largest social media platforms. The narrative also highlights Mark Zuckerberg’s personal battle with FOMO regarding social status, influence, and acceptance. His drive to develop a groundbreaking platform is fuelled by his desire to be included in the prestigious social groups from which he felt ostracized at Harvard.
Africans living in the diaspora can often experience FOMO in a particularly acute way. Hence, a typical Nigerian student Journey to US epitomizes the essence of FOMO as she grapples with the complexities of living between two worlds. In America, she experiences a longing for the authentic Nigerian culture and experiences her peers relish back home. Conversely, while in Nigeria, she contends with the changes that occurred in her absence in America.
Social media platforms, particularly Facebook, have significantly fuelled and magnified the impact of Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) through several mechanisms. For diaspora Africans, FOMO can manifest in several practical ways:
Social Media & FOMO
Africans in the diaspora frequently maintain connections with their friends and family back home via social media. Observing posts about cultural events, celebrations, and daily life can trigger feelings of missing out.
Social media users often share only the highlights of their lives, like vacations, accomplishments, and social events, which can give the impression that others are always leading fulfilling and thrilling lives.
When people see these selectively curated moments, it can prompt them to compare their own lives to these idealized portrayals, often intensifying feelings of insufficiency and isolation.
Event Notifications
Missing out on significant cultural festivals, weddings, and other traditional events can lead to a feeling of loss and disconnection from one’s heritage.
Facebook’s real-time updates make users instantly aware of events and activities they are missing, which can amplify feelings of exclusion and anxiety about not participating.
The unending stream of updates prompts users to frequently check their feeds, thus continuing the cycle of comparison and FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).
Social Validation Metrics
The quantity of likes, comments, and shares a post garner acts as a barometer for social validation. Observing high engagement on friends’ posts may lead users to perceive their own experiences as comparatively less noteworthy or appreciated. Furthermore, the concept of social proof implies that witnessing the high engagement on others’ posts may exert pressure on individuals to engage in similar activities or to produce content that garners equal attention, thereby intensifying the fear of missing out (FOMO).
Personalized feeds & FOMO
Facebook’s algorithms favour content that encourages engagement, often resulting in echo chambers that exacerbate the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO). This phenomenon may contribute to a sense of loss and detachment from one’s cultural roots, as well as a feeling of being left out of cultural events, career opportunities, community gatherings, news, and family milestones. Such experiences can foster feelings of exclusion and estrangement from one’s heritage, alongside a desire for validation and support.
Influencer lifestyle
Facebook’s “On This Day” feature reminds users of past events and experiences, causing nostalgia but also highlighting what users are missing. Influencer culture often showcases idealized lifestyles and exotic travels, making users feel less exciting or worthy. Brand collaborations with influencers and brands further fuel FOMO by implying a certain lifestyle is desirable and attainable, further exacerbating viewers’ feelings of FOMO.
To reduce FOMO on social media, here are 6 strategies to employ:
- Digital detox: Take regular breaks from social media to reduce anxiety.
- Mindful consumption: Be mindful of time spent on social media and content type to focus on positive and realistic representations of life.
- Prioritize real-life connections: Focus on real-life interactions for a more fulfilling sense of community.
- Content curate: Follow accounts that inspire positivity and realistic content to shift the experience.
- Gratitude: Practice gratitude and focus on personal achievements to counterbalance FOMO feelings.
- Education on social media effects: Understand how platforms trigger emotional responses to take control of social media habits and mitigate FOMO.